Today we have Author Anne Tenino, author of Horny, here to celebrate out last post for the My Haunted Blender’s Gay Love Affair, and Other Twisted Tales blog tour. Be sure to enter the contest, explained near the end of the post.
Here’s Anne Tenino:
Have you ever seen that pie chart someone made up, illustrating what causes most problems in Greek mythology? The biggest single cause—roughly 90% of all reasons—is because Zeus can’t keep it in his pants. (Here, I’ll provide a link to an image of it, since I can’t seem to find one that’s free to use: LINK)
The first time I saw that chart I laughed myself sick. I was an art history major in college, and my specialty was Greek and Roman periods. I even took ancient Greek for a few years, and read the Iliad in the original Homeric dialect. I can’t remember most of the language now, but the culture and myths stuck with me. In particular, the truth behind that pie chart joke resonated with me, making it even funnier.
Back then my dream was to go to grad school (which I did, I just didn’t finish) and become a professor of classical art and archaeology. But always in the back of my mind, I kept the idea of someday writing my own version of Greek myths in mind.
Here’s the problem with that—I write romance, and every Greek myth I’ve ever read ends with a resounding Happily Never After. Usually there’s a thunderbolt or two and some evisceration as well.
Now, years later, I’ve remedied that. I’ve written my own, happily ending, Greek myth. Horny is a short story set in contemporary times, depicting the Olympic pantheon as I’d expect it to be now, after 2,500 years. I threw Achilles into the mix, because the guy made a heck of an impression on me when I read the Iliad, but he’s not the main character (however, other hellenophiles might be interested to know that I married Achilles to Patroclus in my world). The main characters in Horny are Leander, a descendant of Eros (who you may know better by his Roman name, Cupid), and a cautious, mortal (or so we think . . .), tavern owner named Ryan Caulfield.
Ryan’s life is thrown into turmoil when a group of mythological creatures claiming to be law enforcement officers appear in his bar one night, and ask for his help to apprehend Zeus. But isn’t Zeus the ruler of Olympus? you may wonder. Well, not anymore. The dude has been deposed, and strict sanctions have been placed on him and the other gods and goddesses of his generation. In particular, Zeus is no longer able to get it up, not without help, and he’s constantly escaping the decrepit gods’ home and devising ways to get up to some hanky-panky.
At its core, Horny isn’t a mystery or an action-adventure story or a law enforcement procedural, it’s a love story (see the bit about the happy ending above). Now you may be wondering how I justify calling it a myth if it ends well. In answer, let me refer you back to the pie chart.
Horny is a modern Greek myth, why? Because, like 90% of the ancient ones, it begins when Zeus can’t keep it in his pants.
Raised on a steady media diet of Monty Python, classical music and the visual arts, Anne Tenino rocked the mental health world when she was the first patient diagnosed with Compulsive Romantic Disorder. Since that day, with her trusty psychiatrist by her side, Anne has taken on conquering the M/M world through therapeutic writing. Finding out who those guys having sex in her head are and what to do with them has been extremely liberating.
Anne’s husband finds it liberating as well, although in a somewhat different way. He has accepted her need for “research”, and looks forward to the benefits said research affords him. He thinks it’s kind of cool she manages to write, as well. Her two daughters are mildly confused by Anne’s need to twist Ken dolls into odd positions. They were raised to be open-minded children, however, and other than occasionally stealing Ken1’s strap-on, they let Mom do her thing without interference.
Anne’s thing is writing gay romance and erotica.
Wondering what Anne does in her spare time? Mostly she lies on the couch, eats bonbons and shirks housework.
Check out what Anne’s up to now by visiting her site. Anne Tenino
More by Anne:
18% Gray | Happy Birthday to Me | Whitetail Rock | The Fix
Turning Tricks | Frat Boy & Toppy | Love, Hypothetically
Sweet Young Thang | Good Boy | Poster Boy | Too Stupid to Live
Ryan Caulfield is a devout avoider of risk, so it comes as a surprise when he agrees to help a group of supernatural law enforcers catch Zeus (the god voted Least Likely to Keep It in His Pants). But how could he say no? He’s nothing if not law-abiding, even if it’s a legal code from another plane of existence. Besides, it all seems harmless enough . . . at least until the half-naked and all-hot immortal with wings and horns shows up.
In his century as an investigator for the Olympic pantheon, Leander of the eroté has solved a lot of cases and slept with a lot of humans. But on this investigation, it looks like he won’t be doing either. His assigned task is bogus, and the most alluring mortal he’s ever met is determined to avoid hooking up.
But the pull Leander feels toward Ryan the bartender won’t let him turn his attention away for long. Soon, he finds himself interested in much more than his usual dalliances with mortals. Now if only he can convince Ryan he’s worth the risk
Riptide is giving away a $25 gift certificate to there online bookstore. All you have to do to enter is leave a comment on any stop on the tour. Each comment (up to one per tour stop) counts as its own entry, so the more you comment, the more chances you have to win.
My Haunted Blender’s Gay Love Affair, and Other Twisted Tales
A collection of not-so-chilling tales of love and laughter from three of the genre’s masters of pulp.
In The Bone Orchard, by Abigail Roux, Pinkerton investigator Ezra Johns and US Marshal Ambrose Shaw have a lot to learn about life—and the afterlife—in their quest to bring a vicious murderer to justice. Fortunately, they’ve got all the time in the world to figure it out.
In City of Monsters, by Andrea Speed, an ex-investigator turned some-kind-of-shifter (he doesn’t know, but with his luck, it’s probably nothing cool) is hired to find a missing reverse tooth fairy in the hellish dimension of Dev. But even simple things aren’t easy for a guy with more vices than virtues, and his situation gets even more complex when a hot newcomer to Dev with a taste for danger joins him on the case.
In Horny, by Anne Tenino, a group of supernatural law enforcers enlist the help of a human, Ryan Caulfield, to catch Zeus: the god voted Least Likely to Keep It in His Pants. But there’s more to Ryan than even he knows, and the satyr searching for Zeus is tempting him with far more than simple justice.
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